Divorce is a very difficult decision, and if you have children, it gets even more difficult. As parents, you want the best for your kids, and for a healthy and proper upbringing, they need their parents to be together. However, at times due to unforeseeable circumstances, you might have to part ways with your partner, which leaves your child in a painful and sad state.
If they are too young, it might be a bit easy for you to separate, but when they are older and start understanding things, it becomes very difficult to make them understand the situation and make sense of the upheaval in their life. Kids have an innocent mind and they are yet to understand complicated things of the world. So, when something like this comes to them, it leaves them in shock and trauma. Some children are able to handle it, some do it with proper care and intervention, while there are others whose mental health can be damaged for life. So, how you break the news is very important because this will help your child cope with the situation better.
5 Effective Ways To Tell Your Child About Your Divorce Can Be:
Tell Your Kids Together:
It is always better to tell your kids about the decision together. This way you can both have your say and get your point across. You coupld probably rehearse together before telling your kids, and decide who says what. This way they still feel that you are together in this and it was a mutual choice.
Avoid The Blame Game:
When it comes to your kids, keep the blame game, egos, arguments aside. You can continue to do that for the rest of your life, but not in front of your children. As it is there is so much upheaval in their lives because of your decision, there is no need ot make it more painful with last-minute fights. Part with happy memories, at least for your child’s sake. Leave the bitterness of your relationship behind.
Give Them The Right Details:
It is better to tell them the reason, but not everything. Do not disclose any details that you don’t think your child can handle or that you can’t explain. They might not understand or try and interpret it the way they like, help them cope with it by explaining to them as many times as they need. Do not disclose your decision to separate when it is still nascent, ensure that both you and your partner are in complete tandem regarding your decision.
Tell Them About What Happens Next:
You also need to tell them what happens next, especially to younger kids. You can tell them who they will stay with or how they can meet the other parent. Also, help them in ways they can deal with it socially or among their friends circle. Ask them about their expectations and aspirations in the future and how they will deal with it.
Assure Them That They Are Not The Reason:
Keep assuring them that they are not the reason for the split. They should not blame themselves in any way. They need not feel dejected or let others blame them in any way. Help them face their emotions and come out of it. Let me understand the consequences and deal with it.
It is true that something like divorce of parents leaves a lasting impact on a child’s mind. If their emotions and feelings are not handled properly, it can lead to a sad aftermath. It can cause emotional breakdown as well as trauma for life. So, be wise and careful, while you discuss such sensitive issues with your child and help them deal with their emotions effectively.